“True Love or True Loser?” (aka, “Are You Going to Get Hurt?”)
This quiz is intended to help you become aware of experiences associated with hurtful relationships and potential abuse.
The 20-question “True Love or True Loser?” relationship quiz is inspired by Dr Joseph Carver’s famous article “Are You Dating a Loser? Identifying Losers, Controllers and Abusers” and has been co-authored by Dr Carver. This quiz is intended to help you become aware of aspects of your relationship experiences which Dr Carver has associated with hurtful relationships and potentially, at particularly high levels, with the types of abuse sometimes linked to personality disorders.
Completing this Relationship Test
To take the questionnaire, please click the radio button next to the selection which best reflects how each statement applies to you. The items refer to your experience of your partner’s behaviour during your relationship. (Please be sure to check the Additional Information and Note on Validity below.)
Take the Relationship Quiz
Please note: This test will only be scored correctly if you answer each one of the questions. Please also check our disclaimer on psychological testing and our psychological testing privacy guarantee.
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About Scoring this Relationship Quiz
Scoring for Questions 1-16:
- 0 points Rarely or none of the time
- 1 point Occasionally or a little of the time
- 4 points A moderate amount of the time, more than occasionally
- 6 points Most or all of the time
This yields a total maximum score of 120.
When your quiz is scored, one of four different information pages will appear to describe the results for scores in your range, along with further details of how your score was computed.
This relationship test is inspired by the list of 20 questions included in Dr Carver’s famous article “Are You Dating a Loser? Identifying Losers, Controllers and Abusers” and has been co-authored by Dr Carver. It is not a diagnostic test and is intended solely to help you identify aspects of your relationship experience which Dr Carver has associated with hurtful relationships and potentially, at particularly high levels, with the types of abuse sometimes linked to personality disorders.
In common with some tests featured on this site which were developed to identify actual symptoms consistent with particular mental disorders, this test has been constructed with a forced-choice semantic interval question design which is intended to avoid the pitfalls of central tendency bias as well as acquiescence bias.
Additional Information and Note on Validity
The “True Love or True Loser?” relationship test was developed by Dr Greg Mulhauser and Dr Joseph Carver. This quiz is not intended in any way as a third-party diagnostic tool for you to make a second-party diagnosis of personality disorder or other mental disorder in your partner.
The notion of formal evaluation for validity, specificity and the like does not apply to this type of informal test which asks about experience of a third party. Therefore, this instrument should not be relied upon in any way as a diagnostic aid but should be used solely as a tool for increasing your own awareness of the type of experience within your relationship which has been highlighted by Dr Carver as potential cause for concern.
Dr Greg Mulhauser, an experienced counsellor and psychotherapist, has developed several screening tests featured on this site, including:
- “Schizophrenia Test and Early Psychosis Indicator (STEPI)”
- “Tri-Axial Bipolar Spectrum Screening Quiz (TABS): Test for Bipolar”
- “Structured Adult ADHD Self-Test (SAAST): Test Yourself for ADHD”
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All clinical material on this site is peer reviewed by one or more clinical psychologists or other qualified mental health professionals. This specific article was originally published by Dr Greg Mulhauser, Managing Editor on .on and was last reviewed or updated by