“Two Types of Narcissism and How to Tell the Difference” Comments, Page 1

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9 Comments (2 Discussion Threads) on “Two Types of Narcissism and How to Tell the Difference”

  1. It would be helpful to have a compare and contrast with what healthy behaviors and reactions are too. What extent do the narcissist behaviors need to be present in order for them to be considered a character disorder? For instance, humans have these behaviors periodically, some of the behaviors which you describe are part of the maturation process, so what differentiates that from a more serious disorder?

    Narcissism appears all over the internet and social media, this appears to be a fad label.

    1. I think this article’s notion of “grandiose narcissism” is just commonly refered to as sociopathy.

    2. Trust me Sandra, as a woman who just ended a marriage to a covert (diagnosed) narcissist, there’s nothing “fad” about it. While narcissism is definitely on a continuum, the unhealthy side of it disturbs and ruins what the people AROUND the narcissist are trying to accomplish with them, not realizing the emotional agenda of the narcissist doesn’t allow for true intimacy or equality. I hope this makes sense!

  2. Hello CD, It’s the empirical literature that’s been promoting these distinctions in the last several years. In my writings, I still prefer a different distinction. And while some might equate so-called grandiose narcissism with sociopathy, they’re definitely not the same thing, although its not uncommon at all for sociopaths to have grandiose narcissitic features. You might want to consider this article in the context of the other articles on this site on the vast continuum of character disturbance and the problems with some of our categorizations. I also address this in my book Character Disturbance.

  3. I was married to a vulnerable “covert” who truly did source for attention and compliments – such odd behavior to see in an adult – and thankfully his neuropsych evaluation confirmed all this along with his deep-seated narcissism. However, once the diagnosis came in, he became more overt in his behaviors towards me, his wife/target and in the end of our marriage was emotionally if not physically cheating and getting his “feed” elsewhere. I no longer catered to his every whim, developed more independence and challenged his childish behaviors. The fights that man would pick out of the air are just unbelievable – I now know they were to avoid any intimacy with me, as he was getting it all elsewhere. Thanks for this great article – education really is key in understanding what the hell happened in your life when involved with the nuclear fall out of narcissism.

  4. I believe my younger sister is a vulnerable narcissist. Our father is also a narcissist (but the grandiose kind), so she might have gotten it from him.
    But she is always playing the victim. She has done that since she was a child, we thought she was just sensitive to pain. She would get bumped by someone walking through the hallway and fall down saying they hit her. She would scream bloody murder if she stubbed her toe so everyone would come over and look at it. I noticed she tends to “get hurt” more often when everyones attention is on someone else’s accomplishments.

    If anyone has any advise on how to deal with her, she is still in the denial phase where she thinks we are crazy for telling her to get help and we are running out of ideas

    1. I am married to your sister, she is always the victim and talks in the third person to overdramatize or alter her identity to gain power or demand respect. Nothing is ever her fault she will blame the devil, me, family ect for any and all problems. She desires praise for screwing up and believes her actions are not to be judged as evil because she states that “your wife” “your children’s mother” “Daughter of the one true God ” followed by the good and pure intention that lead her pure selfless heart to do whatever it is she has done or is planning to do…. then she gets upset if you don’t praise, thank, validate and agree with her for it! (Example would be stripping the house of AC, mailbox, Flagstone patio, every light and fan inside and out, appliances and all contents because of a rat and needing her kids to be safe “I’m a great mom I made it happen for my kids, so they could be in a safe place” and then act like I did something wrong for questioning her?

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