“How Re-Writing Your Story Can Change Your Life” Comments, Page 1

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2 Comments on “How Re-Writing Your Story Can Change Your Life”

  1. I find this topic fascinating and have been steadily re-writing my own life narrative after a lifetime of also being (cast as) the compliant, less-capable figure in my constellation of primary relationships. An interesting offshoot to this topic is how this “narrative re-writing” impacts these relationships; i.e., who adjusts and stays in your orbit vs. who falls away.

  2. There truly are countless benefits and possibilities when someone “re-writes” their story. When I work with people in counseling I see that a great deal of healing can come from first writing their story as it was experienced–writing about their history, family, brokenness, pain, etc. I will often ask depressed clients to “write the story of your depression.” Getting it on paper is cathartic and also gives new perspective. When we confront the past we also begin to gain some control over it–rather than be controlled by it. It’s important to understand how one’s experiences have affected their life story–how they see themselves, how they interact with others, their beliefs about others or about God. Once a person understands their own story and how it has led to who they are today then they can begin re-writing their story. They can identify the scripts that other people may have told them (i.e., “you will never be good enough”), identify that they have internalized these as beliefs (“I am not good enough for anything or for anyone”), and then counteract it with a new script (“I actually am skilled…I do have value…I do have something to contribute”). This can be understood as a process of exposing lies and replacing them with truth. It’s a very basic step in the process of re-writing your story.

    I also invite clients to re-write their story in a meditative or prayerful way. For example, if someone is working with me in counseling towards healing from child abuse, then part of their healing might involve prayerfully and imaginatively returning to the place of the abuse and the experience, but then imagining a new ending. They might envision that they find the strength to get away from the perpetrator or to cry out or that a loved one comes to the rescue or that God is close to them in the experience. We explore some possibilities but ultimately let the prayer unfold in a natural way for the client. Experiencing a new ending in their own story of abuse is oftentimes a powerful and empowering experience for the people I work with in counseling.

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