“Disturbed Characters: Can They Ever Really Change?” Comments, Page 1

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3 Comments on “Disturbed Characters: Can They Ever Really Change?”

  1. As the mother of a woman with a disturbed character, I will never give up on her. It pains me to see how her behavior so negatively impacts her relationships and I know it isn’t everyone else’s fault. She is consistently rude, even to me. If she were autistic and professionals told me she would never change I would still search for a ways to help her improve. Everyone is giving up on her. I can’t blame them but I do see an opportunity. Someone (me) might be able to guide her to take responsibility for herself in a more productive way. Thoughts????

  2. Dr. Simon,

    Are those behaviors dormant, if a person declares “I have changed”, are they suppressed, arrogance is hidden. I wouldn’t trust it.
    Unless they had intensive therapy.

  3. I left my husband and now he wants to do everything I wanted – plan trips, go to church, spend time together (instead of him going to his own activities all weekend every weekend of our entire marriage), go to couples counseling, talk about our marriage regularly, and has quit drinking.
    He even watched videos I sent and has agreed he has narcissist tendencies!
    It’s so tempting to go back, but deep down I feel nervous, scared and trapped around him. And because he is making changes and offering so much, and maybe it wasn’t that bad… It is wearing on me. One thing I have noticed is every conversation is still about him. I went to dinner with him and all he talked about is getting me back. I called from a friend’s event and he asked if I’ve met someone and if I’m coming back. I let him watch a fireworks show with me after dinner and he talked in my ear the whole time about getting back together. It made the show miserable.
    I have my issues, I don’t speak up enough, or I give up after I’ve spoke up a few times. I can be overly accommodating, avoidant, and not make time for myself.
    I believe people can change, but I have heard the same thing several times in our relationship. I don’t want to give up on him, but I just can’t imagine going back. No matter what he says he will do or how he can change, everything in me screams don’t go back.

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