PEEK-A-BOO: Experiments in Consciousness

One of the most amazing things for my younger daughter, fifteen months, is appearing and disappearing. Being visible and then not. Hiding and reappearing. Curtains are the best for this, but any old surface will do, if it’s possible to get behind or under it. But it is already quite a grown-up game, she has already started to see the world as adults do, split up into separate entities.

Sometimes I want to have some space from the all consuming attention my baby daughter requires, in order to think. To read what other people have thought, and researched, and written down, to explore experiences and ideas a little further. Meanwhile, the richest, most fascinating and unique research site lies right under my nose.

One of the most amazing things for my younger daughter, fifteen months, at the moment, is appearing and disappearing. Being visible and then not. Hiding and reappearing. Curtains are the best for this, but any old surface will do, if it’s possible to get behind or under it. But it is already quite a grown-up game, she has already started to see the world as adults do, split up into separate entities.

A few months ago, when she covered her own eyes with her hands, she seemed convinced that I couldn’t see her either. She seemed to think when she prised her tiny little fingers off her eyelids that she had reappeared, and shouted “boo!” in delight. Or maybe that’s just my adult analysis. Well it definitely is. What she was actually doing was making the world disappear and then reappear and ‘boo!’ didn’t mean “ha! I surprised you!” at all, but “Wow — here it all is again!”

I’d like to keep hold of that today — not “here I am” and not “I’m not here and nothing is here” but “Here it all is again!” Me and everything. No difference. BOO!

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