‘Social Skills’ at Psychology, Philosophy and Real Life, Page 2

Neurotics hate to think of themselves as the injuring party and would rather carry the burden of abuse than see themselves as an abuser. Disturbed characters know this well. So, when they want to take advantage, a good one-two punch is to play the victim and then vilify the real victim.

Feigning ignorance is an effective tactic that manipulates the person confronting the behavior into having doubts about the legitimacy of the issue they’re trying to bring to the other person’s attention.

To have a sense of how we appear to others can be helpful information. And “not taking it personally” can actually contribute to our taking “personal responsibility”.

Side-stepping and misleading: rather than being accountable and responsible, what the issue-dodger and subject-changer really wants is to advance their own agenda at the expense of yours, while simultaneously managing your impression of them.

Disordered characters don’t want you to know what they’re all about or what they’re up to. Lying helps keep them one-up on you and a step ahead of you.