Are You Dating a Loser?
Is it always your fault? Have you experienced the mean and sweet cycle? Are you walking on eggshells? Does your partner pass the waitress test? These are among the topics touched on by clinical psychologist Dr Joseph M Carver, PhD, in a guest contribution on dating ‘losers’. Dr Carver will be available to answer relationship questions or comments you’d like to post at the end of this article.
Identifying the ‘Loser’
Although I’m usually pretty skeptical about relationships advice I read on websites, there is actually quite a bit of good, solid content out there. One of the characteristics that distinguishes the ‘good stuff’, in my view, is that rather than giving preachy ‘advice’ or platitudes, or presupposing to know what you’re going through, solid work on relationships appeals to our own self-awareness and capacity to judge for ourselves.
Our guest contribution from clinical psychologist Dr Joseph M Carver, PhD, called Are You Dating a Loser?, falls into the ‘good stuff’ category. The first half of the article highlights some features of relationships with ‘losers’, while the second offers some sensible suggestions for extricating oneself from such a relationship.
I have to say that I feel it’s important to cultivate sympathy and empathy for both halves in a troubled relationship — so I’d hesitate to apply that term ‘loser’ — but nonetheless for those who recognize Carver’s descriptions in their own experience, I think this article offers a great viewpoint.
Relationship Questions or Comments for Dr Carver?
As a special bonus, Dr Carver has generously offered to drop by now and again to answer any questions that may come up for readers who find that Are You Dating a Loser? sounds just a little too familiar.
So, fire up your keyboard if you’d like to put a relationship question to him, and leave your question in the comments section of this blog posting. We’ll let Dr Carver know when your questions or comments are posted, and he can take a look at them.
Postscript: New Thread for Personal Feedback from Dr Carver
Because this original discussion thread about Dr Carver’s article has become so popular — and so many comments have been posted — we’ve now opened up a second discussion thread where you can leave questions or feedback for Dr Carver. So be sure to stop by there instead if you’d like to post a question or comment: “More Personal Replies from Psychologist About Relationships with Losers”. Thanks!
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This article was last reviewed by on Friday, 10th February 2006. Comments are currently closed.
The URL of this page is:
http://counsellingresource.com/features/2006/02/10/relationship-losers/
82 Responses to “Are You Dating a Loser?”
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[...] family would also benefit from reading the discussions on “Losers” and “Stockholm Syndrome” available on Counselling Resource. Your son and your family [...]
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[...] the first discussion thread about The Loser, readers shared their reactions to the article and sought Dr Carver’s [...]
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