Over 1000 Reader Comments and Questions on ‘Losers’ and Personality Disorders
To help our server deliver a snappier response time for the thousands of readers of our threads on Dr Carver’s ‘Loser’ article — the most recent of which has attracted over 350 new comments, we’re going to open this new thread and close the previous one. Combined with around 175 questions on personality disorders submitted to the ‘Ask the Psychologist’ service, we’ve now had over 1000 questions and comments from readers affected by this topic.
The total number of reader comments on all our separate threads about the ‘Loser’ article by consulting Clinical Psychologist Dr Carver (see Are You Dating a Loser? for the original article by Dr Carver) now weighs in at over 900:
- “Are You Dating a Loser?”
- “More Personal Replies from Psychologist About Relationships with Losers”
- “Psychologist’s Description of “The Loser” in Relationships Rings True”
- “Overwhelming Response to Threads on Relationship Losers”
- “More on Relationship Losers, Abusers, Manipulators and Controllers”
- “550 Reader Comments on Dr Carver’s ‘Loser’ Article”
And around 175 additional questions addressing personality disorders — many of them inspired directly by Dr Carver’s ‘Loser’ article — have been submitted to our Ask the Psychologist service, where Dr Carver offers personal feedback on individual reader questions. (And more comments still have come in on Dr Simon’s series of articles on disturbances of character, closely related to personality disorders.)
Because it’s hard for our server to provide the best performance for users reading individual posts with very long lists of comments (more than 350 on the most recent ‘Loser’ thread!), we’re now going to open this new thread for additional comments on the article and close the prior thread.
The flow of comments on the article has taken on something of a life of its own, with many readers leaving replies directly on other readers’ comments in a real spirit of camaraderie and understanding. Readers have been offering support to one another over many weeks, months, and in some cases even years. So please do carry on here in this new thread, and we won’t interrupt — except for the occasional update to another new thread to keep the server running smoothly!
Don’t forget that if you’d like to stay abreast of all the latest happenings across the site as a whole — including Dr Carver’s latest articles in Ask the Psychologist, you can subscribe to our regular newsletter using the graphical link in the right column of this page, which will open a special subscription window without changing the page you’re on. Or if you prefer, just go directly to the main newsletter management page.
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This article was last reviewed by on Saturday, 15th November 2008. You can leave a reply below.
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153 Responses (Including 29 Discussion Threads) to “Over 1000 Reader Comments and Questions on ‘Losers’ and Personality Disorders”
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E P Campbell111
Hi Wendy
I have just visited an NPA website (comparing myself to her) and been led to one inevitable conclusion based on my reactions to her behaviour.
She is an underlying high functioning Asperger’s personality driven by a dominant Narcissistic, Aggressive, Perfectionist character. A contradiction in terms. A highly conflicted soul.
The prevailing opinion is that such a person will find it impossible to have a stable relationship - certainly not with me, as 100+ bustups in 5 years goes to prove without doubt. Not to mention her extremely violent two previous marriages.
While accepting that I am a fairly submissive, non confrontational person by nature, I refuse adamantly to be played with or dominated for self serving ends by any histrionic partner - so I repeatedly walk away and will keep walking, knowing the other person will never change. I can only hope to learn from my mistakes, change myself and choose a calm, healthy, alternative person to love. who will love me back in equal measure - not measure me against an impossible ideal.
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