Understanding “Splitting” as a Psychological Term

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Splitting refers to the unconscious failure to integrate aspects of self or others into a unified whole. The age old conscious and deliberate game of “dividing and conquering” is not the same as splitting.

More on aggression

More on depersonalization

Dissociative Disorders include Dissociative Identity Disorder (formerly known as Multiple Personality Disorder), Depersonalization Disorder, Dissociative Fugue and Dissociative Amnesia.

I’ve been posting on several terms frequently used by mental health professionals that are not only encountered in mental health settings but also with increasing frequency in common parlance. The term “splitting” is another one of those terms. And, like some of the other terms I’ve been posting on, it’s also been subject to considerable misuse in recent times.

Splitting is a term that came out of classical (psychoanalytical or psychodynamic) schools of thought and refers to an unconscious ego defense mechanism by which a fairly complex entity cannot be accepted into consciousness in its entirety because it contains aspects that are both acceptable to a person as well as unacceptable. Relatively underdeveloped personalities, most especially borderline personalities, have a hard time incorporating into consciousness seemingly contradictory aspects of the same person or thing. So, they unconsciously separate or “split” objects into two categories, seeing the “good” side of a person or thing as the part they find acceptable and the “bad” side of the person or thing as the part they find painful or unacceptable. And, it’s much more than just seeing both a good and a bad side to everything. They actually “split” a single entity into two opposing realities, conceptualizing for example a mother who has both a gentle and a terrifying side as alternately “good mommy,” or “bad mommy.” As a result, they will often alternate between over-idealizing and devaluing the same person. Underdeveloped and poorly integrated personalities not only separate difficult to integrate external “objects” or persons this way, but they also “split” into disparate parts aspects of themselves that are hard to integrate into a cohesive whole. So, extreme degrees of internal splitting can result in a fragmentation of the self through such mechanisms as dissociation or even multiple personality formation.

Now, in recent times, unfortunately, the term splitting has been used to denote the very conscious tactic of pitting one entity against another. As any parent knows, children learn early on how to “divide and conquer” when it comes to getting the things they want from their caretakers. If mom says “No,” then see what dad will say. If one teacher won’t support you, see what another says. That’s the strategy. Children and adolescents in schools, residential centers, treatment settings, etc. also use the same strategy, and that’s how the term splitting began to be misused. It just so happens that some young persons in such settings have certain personality characteristics (e.g., borderline personality characteristics) that predispose them to split their internal mental representations of staff members into “good” and “bad” staff. Sometimes their penchant for wanting to deal only with those they perceived as “good” and their expressed disdain for those staff they perceived as “bad” had the net result of creating some fairly intense divisions among the staff. Eventually, this kind of behavior came to be known as “staff splitting.”

While it is true that divisions can arise in a group of caretakers as the result of genuine “splitting” on the part of some very marginally integrated personalities, most of the time, when people use the term splitting, they’re really talking about a very conscious, deliberate tactic used by fairly well-integrated but headstrong and combative personalities who want what they want at all costs and are willing to do whatever it takes to defeat their “opponents.” The tactic of dividing and conquering is as old as time and is a tried and true, reliable means of achieving those ends. It’s a strategy learned early in life and that gets repeated because it works.

The divide and conquer strategy is just one of the many effective tactics certain personalities use to get their way. Among the most disordered characters, aggressive personalities are prone to using this tactics. But the strategy is just one in a virtual arsenal of weapons these individuals have to manipulate and control situations and people. In the next several posts, I’ll be writing some fairly in-depth articles on each of the aggressive personality subtypes. Of all the disordered characters, they are the most important personalities to understand and reckon with. After discussing each aggressive subtype in depth, I’ll also be posting on the many tactics besides the “divide and conquer” strategy that such personalities use to manipulate, control, dominate, exploit, and abuse others. I’ll also be posting later on the kinds of distorted thinking and dysfunctional attitudes that lead to such behaviors.

About the Author: Dr. George Simon received his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from Texas Tech University and has specialized in disturbances of personality and character for almost 25 years. He has appeared on several national radio and TV programs, including Fox News Network and CNN, given over 250 workshops and seminars nationwide, and consulted to numerous businesses, agencies, and organizations seeking his expertise on character disturbance.

This article was last reviewed by Dr Greg Mulhauser, Managing Editor on Tuesday, 28th October 2008. You can leave a reply below.

The URL of this page is:
http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/10/28/splitting-as-psychological-term/

6 Responses to “Understanding “Splitting” as a Psychological Term”

  1. Oprah started me on my path!
    1

    [...] reading this article, I’m more convinced that most Borderline Personalities are awakened beings that aren’t [...]


  2. avatar image
    Dr George Simon, PhD
    2

    There are so many misconceptions about the nature of borderline personalities, especially their strengths and weaknesses. And, there’s a tendency to ascribe negative connotations to all individuals who possess what would rightfully be described as a borderline level of personality organization despite the fact that these personalities vary quite greatly both in their ability to function adaptively (in many cases with remarkable creativity) and in the degree to which they exhibit behavior patterns that are problematic for both themselves and others. Some individuals with borderline characteristics are not only quite functional but are some of the most intriguing and talented people you’ll ever encounter. I plan to do some posting on how the whole borderline conceptualization fits into a cohesive understanding of personality and character in some future posts as well as in a soon to be released book.


  3. avatar image
    Diane
    3

    Hi George.

    Interesting article! Looking forward to the next series.

    On the subject of Borderline Personalities I’d say they just tend to ruin normal day to day functioning. And also ruin those family events and vacations just like clockwork. Everyone who knows them expects the outbursts! I also agree that they can be functioal in unique ways as well. I think things are easier for them to maneuver in and around. Its interpersonal relationships with people that are the difficult task for them.


  4. avatar image
    Eleni
    4

    What I found to be telling about your article is how the term “splitting” has evolved to people who need to have it their way. My parents used to tell me that all the time. Of course today, the truth of why I was the way I was is out in the open. It wasn’t about getting my way. It was difficult to compromise my ideals of right and wrong. The conflicting messages my parents gave me were confusing. As we grow, we develop productive ways of coping without the need to compromise our core principles. Today, my “splitting” is gone, so I know from personal experience it is possible to live as a complete being. It’s just a matter of having the will to do so.

    Great site. Looking forward to reading more.


  5. avatar image
    Vinca Minor
    5

    Whether one refers to it erroneously as “splitting” or not, I would be interested to hear more on your views of Divide-and-Conquer, and how to deal with it one’s family. Thank you very much!


  6. avatar image
    Dr George Simon, PhD
    6

    Vinca asks a great question. The divide and conquer strategy is commonly used in families. It works as a strategy when the primary alliances that should exist don’t. For example, in a nuclear family, the primary alliance is supposed to be between two healthy, responsible, mutually-respecting adults. Children who grow up in such families may try the divide and conquer strategy with their parents, but if their alliance of their parents is strong and their parents’ awareness is high, the strategy probably won’t work and they’ll have to either try something else or modify their behavior. Whenever the divide and conquer strategy is working, it means that a necessary alliance has either broken down, is frail, or has never been there in the first place. Rather than focusing attention on the actors in the divide and conquer scheme, best to give attention to the alliance needing repair.


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