Comments on: Empathy Against Torture http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/01/16/torture-empathy/ Looking at life through the prism of psychology, philosophy, mental health and more. Originally created by counsellor, psychotherapist and philosopher Dr Greg Mulhauser, this blog is now the work of an international team of contributors. Mon, 13 Feb 2012 12:49:10 +0000 hourly 1 By: SS http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/01/16/torture-empathy/#comment-49213 SS Tue, 24 Mar 2009 19:46:58 +0000 http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/01/16/torture-empathy/#comment-49213 I'm sorry for your loss. You might want to think about the fact that you are claiming we should not blame or judge, while referring to some people as "monsters". That is judgemental language that would prevent you from feeling empathy for someone whose behavior or life situation you don't immediately understand. I’m sorry for your loss.

You might want to think about the fact that you are claiming we should not blame or judge, while referring to some people as “monsters”. That is judgemental language that would prevent you from feeling empathy for someone whose behavior or life situation you don’t immediately understand.

]]> By: Sarah Luczaj http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/01/16/torture-empathy/#comment-49070 Sarah Luczaj Wed, 18 Mar 2009 20:07:16 +0000 http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/01/16/torture-empathy/#comment-49070 Greivingmother - I know about loss, but the kind of complicated grief you are going through, with so many factors which others cannot understand and do not want to understand, is hard for me to conceive of - 'hideously painful" I imagine is only scratching the surface of what you feel. You write so truthfully and eloquently. I am so sorry for what happened to you son, and I do hope you find the support you need, which allows you to go through the suffering and not be rushed, and not feel too isolated along the way. Greivingmother – I know about loss, but the kind of complicated grief you are going through, with so many factors which others cannot understand and do not want to understand, is hard for me to conceive of – ‘hideously painful” I imagine is only scratching the surface of what you feel. You write so truthfully and eloquently. I am so sorry for what happened to you son, and I do hope you find the support you need, which allows you to go through the suffering and not be rushed, and not feel too isolated along the way.

]]> By: greivingmother http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/01/16/torture-empathy/#comment-49037 greivingmother Tue, 17 Mar 2009 22:40:25 +0000 http://counsellingresource.com/features/2008/01/16/torture-empathy/#comment-49037 I know this is an old post, but it did strike me that you're in my territory now. I lost my only child, age 13, by hanging. I do not know if it was his intention to die, or if he was the victim of a stupid "choking game" that has taken the lives of thousands of middle school children. I do know about grief. I know about empathy, and LACK of it. I know about people's misplaced judgment about this tragedy and I know about PTSD. Empathy is all we have that separates us from monsters who do not value human life. It seems that in any tragedy, or sudden death that can easily be misinterpreted (such as my son's) there is a rush to blame, someone has to be held accountable. Why is this so? When simple empathy is the only correct response to suffering. Not blame. Not judgement. Not even the suggestion that one can use this "event" to be empowered and make a difference in the world. Well, in due time, perhaps. But first, allow the person to suffer. Allow them to heal, and this takes so much patience and kindness in a society that DEMANDS immediate healing. It is NOT immediate, this process of grief and trauma recovery. It is very, very slow. It is hideously painful. Empathy is the one and only response that works. Empathy is in short supply. I know this is an old post, but it did strike me that you’re in my territory now. I lost my only child, age 13, by hanging. I do not know if it was his intention to die, or if he was the victim of a stupid “choking game” that has taken the lives of thousands of middle school children. I do know about grief. I know about empathy, and LACK of it. I know about people’s misplaced judgment about this tragedy and I know about PTSD. Empathy is all we have that separates us from monsters who do not value human life. It seems that in any tragedy, or sudden death that can easily be misinterpreted (such as my son’s) there is a rush to blame, someone has to be held accountable. Why is this so? When simple empathy is the only correct response to suffering. Not blame. Not judgement. Not even the suggestion that one can use this “event” to be empowered and make a difference in the world. Well, in due time, perhaps. But first, allow the person to suffer. Allow them to heal, and this takes so much patience and kindness in a society that DEMANDS immediate healing. It is NOT immediate, this process of grief and trauma recovery. It is very, very slow. It is hideously painful. Empathy is the one and only response that works. Empathy is in short supply.

]]>