Do Men and Women Think Differently About Aging?

Reader’s Question

I’m curious whether the psychology behind aging is different for women than men. Besides the physical changes of growing older, do women change emotionally and psychologically as they age? It seems to me that women start dreading their birthdays after 29. Is this a media-driven reaction or a natural instinct?

Our Clinical Psychologist’s Reply

If the amount of research on this topic is any indication, a lot of people wonder the same thing that you do. Indeed, there are several institutes and university departments that routinely address not only the science of aging, but also the differences between men and women in their responses to the aging process.

Most experts agree that our attitudes toward aging are affected significantly by cultural norms and values. It’s not only the media’s obsession with youth and beauty but also the value society places on maturity, experience, and wisdom as opposed to youthful energy and sex appeal. In some cultures, where reverence and respect for older persons is high, there does not appear to be nearly as much dread of aging.

In western societies, certain stereotypes fostered by cultural values appear to reinforce the notion that women face a greater challenge than men when it comes to viewing aging in a positive manner. Despite the stereotypes that exist, research has shown that both men and women face some very similar challenges with regard to how they respond to advancing age. Several factors appear to influence whether a person, especially a woman, will age “gracefully.” Suggestions for avoiding a negative psychological response to aging include:

• Maintaining a strong social support network of family and friends
• Being faithful to a personal fitness program
• Feeding one’s brain with stimulating intellectual exercises as well as entertaining activity
• Managing finances wisely
• Eating a healthy diet, using alcohol moderately, and avoiding harmful substances

So, as trite as it may seem, life after 29 is indeed what you make it to be. The steps outlined above are not advocated simply to help a person feel and stay “young,” but rather to feel and stay happy and fulfilled at any age.