I Need to Overcome My Deep Dislike of Physicians
Clinical psychologist Dr Joseph M Carver, PhD, offers replies to reader questions submitted anonymously to Ask the Psychologist.
Reader’s Question
Five years ago, medical doctors made me very sick. Since then I’m often in a lot of physical pain. I have difficulties talking to medical doctors (dealing with them in general) because of my deep dislike of them. I’d like to have better communication with them to resolve my medical issues.
Our Consulting Clinical Psychologist’s Reply
You are likely having difficulty with Emotional Memory. Emotional Memories contain details of past events and the mood we experienced at the time. Recalling an Emotional Memory thus brings up not only the details of your illness, but changes your brain chemistry to duplicate the same mood you experienced at the time the memory was made.
Five years ago and since that time, you have experienced significant emotional and physical trauma related to your illness, treatment, and continued symptoms. The entire experience has left you “traumatized” as though going through some lengthy, horrible experience. You now have strong memories of those events — memories that also connect physicians with your pain and difficulties. Now, each time you think of physicians and medical treatment, your Emotional Memories remember the pain, feelings of discomfort, and resentment of many years ago. That feeling is “deep dislike”.
Time doesn’t change our feelings — rethinking them and adding new feelings does, however. In my Emotional Memory article, you’ll find strategies to change your Emotional Memories about physicians and your experience. You’ll need some self-talk to remind you that these are new physicians, your situation is also new, and you are more educated than before.
It’s like being severely bitten by a dog. The brain then goes on alert and gives you a panic feeling in the presence of any dog from that point. These memories become more intense if you’ve obtained a job in a pet store. Despite your fears, to work in the pet store you must make a new relationship with dogs. As the new relationship works well, the emotions connected with the past experience subside although you will forever remember that you feared dogs at one time in your life.
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