Dorm Student with Asperger’s

Reader’s Question

I’m a Resident Assistant in a dorm at my university, and I’m in charge of a floor of about sixty girls and guys. One of my male students has unusual personal traits and habits which have made many of his floormates uncomfortable. I think he may have Asperger’s. He speaks in a low, jerky, clenched monotone, with almost no affect to his speech and no facial expression, and he doesn’t seem to understand jokes or know how to have a casual back-and-forth. He is clear in his language and friendly in that he always responds to questions and seems to want to interact. He approaches people he knows and says hi, or asks how their days were, but when literal conversation and direct questions end, he doesn’t know what to do and often stands awkwardly long past the conversational stopping point. I don’t believe he has friends. This boy also doesn’t sleep — he sits in the lobby or wanders the rest of the building during the night, often spending six or seven consecutive hours in front of the television taking copious notes in his pocket journal.

This behavior, as you can imagine, has already earned him a badge of “weirdness” among his peers, but I’ve heard reports from several students that he also takes notes on people — hovering over them when they are in the lobby, going up and down the hall checking doorknobs while people are sleeping, entering rooms without permission, following girls from floor to floor.

I don’t believe this boy is harmful, just extremely socially dysfunctional, but I can’t ignore the safety concerns of my other residents either. The direct approach has not worked. My co-R.A. already talked to him about privacy, not entering other people’s rooms, that sort of thing, and the behavior has not stopped. What should I do? I don’t want him to get in trouble, and I’m not allowed to contact his parents or recommend any counseling services unless he asks. I don’t think he has seen any sort of professional before.

Our Clinical Psychologist’s Reply

Your description would suggest Asperger’s Disorder, especially if his behavior has been present for many years. The anxiety of his new environment may be amplifying his Asperger’s characteristics, creating the intrusive behavior you see in the dorm setting. Obviously, this young man is ill-equipped personally and socially to be in an independent living situation, especially a dorm. For whatever reason, he has been sent to the university with little or no consideration for his lack of social skills.

You mention that you don’t want to get him into trouble — he’s already in trouble! He’s violating the rights and privacy of others, incapable of responding to guidance and correction, and behaving in a manner that places him at-risk for assault (entering rooms, especially at night). In this situation, I’m afraid you’ll need to go to the next level of administration. I’d document the complaints and your attempts to correct the situation and the results — then go to the next level of authority. It may require disciplinary action to prompt him to seek mental health intervention. Universities often use mandatory professional intervention rather than school discipline in these situations.

I’m also concerned, like you, about his sleep patterns. This little or no sleep suggests a level of severe agitation that will increase his behaviors. Additional evidence is following females, copious note-taking, etc. This level of agitation would suggest psychiatric agitation rather than being a night-owl.

Lastly, if you have a chance to talk to his parents in some capacity, it’s important to determine if this is a long-standing pattern or only recently surfaced. If he’s always been this way, it’s probably Asperger’s. If this is a brand new pattern of behavior, compared to a “normal” history in high school, his behavior and agitation may be part of a serious psychiatric decompensation. As an example, Schizophrenia typically surfaces between the ages of 18 and 25 and the stress of college, military boot camp, new jobs, etc. are well-known to produce the first decompensation.

In short, as you suspected, this is a very serious situation. I’d recommend following the procedures that prompt a psychiatric referral for this young man. Sadly, despite his intellectual and academic level, he may need more social and independent-living experience before he is capable of university attendance. In clinical practice, I often recommend that youth in his situation begin at a community college — gradually improving their social skills before leaving home and entering the university setting and independent living.