Partner is Silent and Distant. Does He Want to Quit?

Reader’s Question

Why do I feel like that my man is sending signals by his silence/distance? That he wants to quit this relationship?

Our Consulting Clinical Psychologist’s Reply

People sometimes fade away and detach in relationships. Silence, emotional distance, less frequent meetings, etc. can all be early warning signs that the relationship is changing. These same signs can also be something else.

Under stress from employment, family, health issues, etc. people become less energetic, quiet, and seem distant. Your partner may be experiencing stress in his life that is not related to the relationship. Has he mentioned a lot of stressful situations in his life recently? The question then becomes — is his change in behavior related to the relationship or his personal issues?

In your situation, you have several options. You can:

1. Do nothing and see if the situation returns to normal on its own,
2. Bring his change in behavior to his attention and see if he has an explanation, or
3. Be supportive and understanding of his silence and distance and let him know that you’re willing to help in any manner possible.

A change in behavior often means something is happening with the partner. Sometimes it’s related to the relationship and at other times it isn’t related. Open communication and honesty with your partner will help clarify which situation is present.